Saturday, October 28, 2006

the father of invention

I knew that I would have to go into work today. I missed a day and a half this week; things are past due; I have no choice.

I knew this when I woke up this morning. I went downstairs and saw that everything was laid out perfectly on the counter for my breakfast. Scanning from right to left, I saw sitting near each other the packets of instant oatmeal, the fresh-brewed coffee in the coffee pot, and the teapot with steaming hot water. I poured a cup of coffee. I pulled a bowl out of the cupboard. I opened the last packet of my favorite type of instant oatmeal, Quaker Maple & Brown Sugar Oatmeal Crunch, and emptied the contents into the bowl. This has an extra “cluster packet” of crunchy things to put on top. I don’t know what they are but they taste great. This morning I went ahead and added the crunchies on top of the oatmeal mix instead of waiting until after the hot water.

If I had to spend a whole Saturday in the office, I wanted to treat myself to the best. Today, there would be no Food Club instant oatmeal for me!

Next I grabbed the pot and poured just the right amount over the mix so as to obtain the optimal consistency for my oatmeal. My favorite part of the breakfast creation process comes next. I stand and watch the dull, off-white mix expand and metamorphose into a lovely, light caramel color as the brown sugar melts and is absorbed into the oatmeal. Soon after, the fragrance of the unique blend of flavors begins to rise and I slowly breathe it in. Finally, I take the creation into the dining room to sit and eat, enjoying not only the taste, but experiencing the comfort and warmth it brings forth after being consumed.

To properly and completely enjoy Quaker Maple & Brown Sugar Oatmeal Crunch, one must involve all the senses.

However, this morning was different. After I poured just the right amount over the oatmeal mix, I noticed the metamorphic process not only had happened quite suddenly, but that the lovely light caramel color was decidedly darker.

To my horror, it slowly dawned upon me that something was amiss. My quick-as-thunder mind came to the realization that it was quite possible I had not picked up the teapot, but had instead grabbed the pot of coffee. After a minute or so of staring in disbelief at my bowl of very dark brown oatmeal, the full extent of this tragedy began to intrude upon my consciousness. This was more than a loss of instant oatmeal. I had already added the cluster packet. I had lost my tasty crunchies to the coffee!

What to do? I could put it down the garbage disposal. However, I could not bring myself to throw out Quaker Maple & Brown Sugar Oatmeal Crunch, especially if it included the beloved cluster packet. So what the heck, I decided to eat it. I had lost any desire for breakfast anyway. I might as well just fill my stomach and go to the office. You know, buck up and get on with life, that sort of thing.

Actually, it was not bad. I had invented coffee-favored oatmeal. After all, there is coffee-flavored ice-cream and coffee-flavored candy, why not oatmeal?

Yes, I am the inventor of coffee-flavored instant oatmeal. Feel free to try it, but remember to always give credit to whom credit is due. (That be me.) The next time I make it I think I will use the Food Club plain or brown sugar oatmeal mix. It is a waste of the good stuff to mix it with coffee, but coffee could really add value to the cheap stuff.

Yes, there is a lesson to be learned from this story:

Necessity is the mother of invention. Stupidity may well be the father.

Be blessed!
RB

1 comment:

Deb said...

Oh, you're too funny! (I am sorry about the good oatmeal, though.)